I am sure I am late to this trend and probably there is now a new and more hip way of putting your stories in the world, but I never was on trend.
I am an alcoholic and today I am happy to be able to put "recovering" in front. But my recovery is more than not drinking so that "recovering" part can be sketchy at times. My sobriety date is 9/24/2008, which is not long in my opinion. I am not knocking it, just being realistic. I have abused myself alot longer than I have been clean.
I am starting this blog because I have alot of things that have happened to me in this short period of "clean" that are truly remarkable and show the strength and beauty of my Higher Power whom I know to be God. I am in sales and from a line of sales people so I can tell a story and am compelled to put some good news stories out there. Lord knows I have put some bad ones out there and perhaps in 100 years I can achieve balance.
I just finished a wonderful book by Beth Moore on female insecurity. Although I do not always see eye to eye with fundamental Christians I thought this lady was on target for me. She showed me a scripture passage that she suggested as a mantra for women to hold onto in this difficult world that God clothes us with "strength and dignity" and I am working to hold on to that as my natural state inside my head is to clothe me in reaction and facade. Most people who know me do not have that experience of me, but there are a few unfortunates mostly lovers and very close friends who are in the know.
I truly want to have God remove my insecurity as it feeds most of the bad behavior I do and so destroys most of the relationships that have meant something to me. It also was used by my addiction to keep me self-medicating far after it was clear it was causing me more harm.
I am experiencing amazing "ah ha" moments in this time of my life and I hope they mean something to someone besides me. I am afraid of sounding like a Bible thumper or Big Book thumper, but I am also very afraid not to give the glory to a saving Lord who is so generously working in my life. Its a "under the bushel" kind of thing and I have never been one to shrink from the spotlight.
So enjoy...let me know how your journey's are going...
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Wait, what? HELLO? Why is this the FIRST I'm hearing about your blog? I mean SERIOUSLY?
ReplyDeleteOkay so now any of your friends reading this (the ones who don't already know me) assume I'm a fifteen year old girl. Eh, wouldn't be the first time. Very excited to make this discovery today, my dear, even as it lets me catch up a bit on what sounds like to have been some rough times in the past. Always a little weird to catch up with a loved one when she is in a good place, but after a rough one. Looking forward to having this additional venue for connecting. And yeah, I've never been on trend either. Twitter seems to be the most recent hot new thing, and I think even that is SO yesterday for most. You and I can still meet up with our walkers here in blogdom, though.
Love you.